DEAR ABBY: I recently welcomed my third child, a baby boy who was wanted and planned. We are overjoyed. Our two daughters are just under 10 years old. Over the years, my social circle has consisted mostly of the parents of my daughters’ friends.

Abby, my news was met with mixed reactions. Some were thrilled for my pregnancy, while others were shocked. One woman even told me, “I’m just not in that phase of life anymore.”

After my son was born, I didn’t get visits or even a phone call from some of them. I announced his birth on social media and mailed out a beautiful announcement, but he hasn’t been acknowledged nor have I been checked on.

I know he won’t really be affected by this and I’m trying to focus on the positives. We have a big family on both sides, and many people within our community have warmly welcomed him. But I have been a good friend to these women, supported them in their times of need and even reached out during this pandemic to check on them in an effort to reconnect. I’m so disappointed. What am I supposed to say to these “friends” when I run into them again?


DEAR MOM: When you encounter them, be cordial. Make polite conversation and ask how they and their families are doing. If they inquire, tell them you and your family are well. Then move on, recognizing you are dealing with individuals who are solely centered upon themselves. Do not attempt to revive a relationship with anyone who cares so little about you that they would treat you as they have, but DO recognize how fortunate you are that you know not to invest more of your time or yourself in them.


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