DEAR ABBY: For the past eight years, my son has been seeing “Tanya” and, according to him, she spends a lot. I’m concerned about it.
Because of the pandemic, Tanya got furloughed from her employer. She lives in an apartment but has all deliveries sent to OUR home address. Since the pandemic, we are receiving many more packages for her every day from online stores. Our son has mentioned to us that she has huge credit card bills. I’m worried if these two get more serious (marriage), it will cause problems in the future.
I’m tempted to say something to Tanya about the sudden increase in deliveries. Or should I keep quiet? We tell our son, but he always has no comment. Some days it’s like Christmas Day for packages.
— PERPLEXED DAD IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR DAD: Your son and Tanya are adults. If anyone addresses her spending, it should be your son. I don’t advise saying anything to Tanya because it’s sure to be resented and could possibly cause a rift between you and your son. Talk to him one more time and explain your concern that his girlfriend is showing symptoms of being a spendaholic. But after that, drop it because the problem will be his, not yours, to solve.
DEAR ABBY: My husband plays a video golf game most of the time while we watch TV together. If I ask him an occasional question or want to show him something, he says I am interrupting him and I need to wait until he takes his golf shot.
It’s very frustrating to always be put on hold when we are together. I think communication is more important than a game. I’m tired of always having to wait, so I just say, “Never mind.” Any suggestions?
— OUT OF THE GAME
DEAR OUT: Just saying “never mind” doesn’t get your message across. The next time it happens, TELL your husband how you feel about coming in second place behind his toy, because you don’t “interrupt” often and you are more important than his video golf game.